It started with an article I read last week in the New York Times. "The Long Road To Adulthood Growing Longer" explained that while baby boomers are the generation that hangs on to a kind of 'perpetual adolescence" forever, now a younger wave of women in their 20's and 30's is following their example.
Apparently, "independence no longer begins at 21" and women now officially take much longer to finish school, leave their parent's homes, achieve financial independence, have kids---and regardless of our age, many women are dressing to show that they still feel like teenagers right up into our sixties.
The day after I read the article, I met with a new client. A well-known writer. Just turned 40. A very talented and very sexy girl with an emphasis on the 'girl' part when it came to her wardrobe. Having been engaged to help her evolve her style but still retain her signature look, ( did I mention sexy?) I went through her closets and found them filled with plunging necklines, tight, short short, faddish, disposable gear. "Young' was putting it mildly. As I pulled out the second short shorts jumpsuit I explained that these looked very Forever 21 to me. Not 'youthful' or hip just flat out young. "But shorts shorts are super cute," she said. And then she layed it on me. "What's wrong with looking young?", she asked as she tossed her very long, layered hair.
So, let's take a second to talk about 'super cute'. On my list: babies in little rompers. Little girls in sweet dresses with bows or tiny ruffles. Teeny tiny flower prints. Puffed sleeves. Baby doll anything. Coltish teenage girls in the outrageous and short looks of the moment. Grown women need to pack away 'super cute' with their yearbooks and move into a sophisticated update of their personal style. Problem is we can't seem to nail down when 'grown woman' begins visually.
Another day and NYC's first sidewalk-searing heat wave. Nothing brings out the short short lengths like savage humidity. I was shopping for a job in the contemporary department at Saks (ground zero for women of a certain age shopping for 'super cute') when I spotted La Romper, a 50-ish woman stepping from the dressing room to take a turn on the selling floor in a cotton romper ( that would be a thigh-gripping pair of bloomer shorts attached to a strapless blouson top). As I gawped, I heard this exchange:
Saleswoman: "That looks soooo cute on you!"
La Romper: "I probably shouldn't be wearing this right? I've always liked to dress for my legs."
Saleswoman: " Oh no. It's great. You should get it! You look FABULOUS".
She did have a pair of well-turned calves along with a braless and drooping bust, slack skin on her upper arms and some cellulite and a riot of busted capillaries on her thighs. In short, a normal woman. Normal aging. Big deal. But I wanted to say "Geez Romper! Why not show off your great calves and cover the rest of the bits that expose the age you are working so hard to deny?" Now, if you are out there thinking "Oh c'mon! She is clearly delusional." Maybe. But aren't the romper-wearing 50-year-olds of the world like distress flares sent up over dark, open water? Isn't a woman dressed like a teenager a livid reminder of how far our culture's morbid obsession with growing old will drive some women to avoid looking old?
There isn't anything natural or even familiar with the way we age now. We can Botox, porcelain veneer, fraxel, lipo, fortify our stressed and aging tresses with miracle conditioners so that we can wear them very long. And as long as media holds up celebs like Madonna and Demi Moore as the standard bearers of aging well through 'yoga and diet' the greater the age rollback among average women.
Our concept of what 'old' looks like is as skewed as our culture's trajectory from Forever 21 to womanhood.
Altering our bodies to look decades younger doesn't mean we won't look ridiculous dressing decades younger. So, here's how I reconcile the mid-20's age I feel in my head with my reasonably fit but middle-aged body. It's my ageless equation ( and the raison d'etre for my book Style Evolution) for looking great in your skirts or shorts or your anything this summer: Concentrate on real body awareness. A clever conceal wherever needed plus a subtle reveal wherever flattering equals grownup style intelligence. Easy.
If your legs look good and your knees are intact - one inch above the knee in skirts and dresses. Don' t care how great those stems are. Sleeveless is not your friend if it puts aging skin front and center. Wear clean-lined or pretty sleeves. And no rompers past college graduation.
The Oscars of fashion is the annual
Vogue-sponsored red carpet fete for the
Metropolitan Museum's Costume Institute. But this year's show
"American Woman: Fashioning a National Identity" happens to
run concurrently with an exhibit at the
Brooklyn Museum "
American High Style: Fashioning a National Collection featuring a beautifully curated 85 masterpieces of couture. Along with Elsa Schiaparelli pieces like the surrealist plastic disk necklace crawling with toy insects ( below left) and elegant, here-and-now-looking pieces by Norman Norell (below right), the show has an interesting focus on the forties-a pivotal time in American fashion. Couture customers stranded stateside by Germans in Paris discovered a talented group of American women designers. Claire McCardell, Bonnie Cashin, Valentina (whose designs were worn in films by Garbo and Kathryn Hepburn),Carolyn Schnurer and Vera Maxwell had the business incentive and freedom to express a "national identity' with their designs. Enamored of Schiaparelli's surrealist sportswear like divided tennis skirts and one of the first (if not the first) pant suits they created clothes that broke with the formality and rigor of French fashion.
Claire McCardell had an especially modern design sensibility. With casual and uncomplicated silhouettes, her 'play clothes' pioneered a distinctly American style that broke ranks with the fussiness of many French clothes. We can credit her and Bonnie Cashin ( among others) for the American ideal of sportswear.
You don't have to live in New York to experience some of the collection. The Brooklyn show has a virtual/interactive element too. The museum has partnered with Polyvore, the social networking site where members create and share collages of fashion pictures. Visitors to the
museum's website or to
Polyvore will be able to mix and match the museum's fashions with any image on Polyvore. This should thrill the world's aspiring Anna Wintours to create clever mash-ups of the iconic with the right now. Those who want to see more of the museum's 4000 holdings which include Balanciaga and Yves St. Laurent as well as Americans Scassi and Geoffrey Beene can view them on the
ARTstor digital library.
Utility has replaced Flash. So, for now anyway, it's time to pack away anything tight and excessively girly and to embrace an easy going and 'effortless' mix: dressed with casual, masculine with feminine. It's a look that says " This old thing? I just threw it on with these safari pants and six-inch platforms and I was out the door." Of course, 'effortless' is a fashion myth. It takes some effort to look good whatever your personal style.
During a recent radio interview I was asked to describe what 'effortless style' means. Yipes. Whole articles have been written on the subject, illustrated with the usual photos of Kate Moss and Charlotte Gainsbourgh. My answer: " 'Effortless' describes the woman whose ability to put herself together in the right looks appears to be as reflexive as breathing. She knows herself and dresses for her body." Okay, so it was a start but it doesn't entirely define ES. Lately, I've watched a lot of women in airports, lobbies, stores, restaurants and the street and I've come up with six things that are constants in a seemingly 'effortless' look.
Have a few uniforms
Know your body. If you look best in the structure of a jacket or a lightweight 'signature' coat or in a particular dress shape then go with it. Designer Carolina Herrera wears a white shirt most days. The bottoms vary but the crisp white shirt is a constant. Singer Patti Smith, now in her sixth decade, is never without one of Ann Demeulemeester's mannish, tailored black jackets to add definition to her slight frame. Or legendary Vogue editor Diana Vreeland (above) whose uniforms included black cashmere cardigan's worn backwards and matching cuffs on each wrist. It is less labor intensive to shop for updated versions of the proven winners in your wardrobe. It's not limiting. It's liberating.
Above L-R Carolina Herrera takes a bow after her F/W 2010 show. A blazer from Ann Demeulemeester's F/W 2010 show. Both images from style.com.
Embrace evolution. Keep your look evolving. For those of you who've read my book Style Evolution you know I am a big believer in steady, incremental change. Small seasonal tweaks here and there keep a woman looking plugged in to now. The french describe someone who is plugged in as trés branché. This doesn't necessarily mean faddish or trendy to the extreme but rather observant, adaptable and youthful.
Opposites Do Attract - Masculine with feminine is a timeless combination. Menswear inspired tailoring will always look great paired with a soft blouse and statement jewelry. Wear dressed-up pieces with shine with utilitarian classics like the trench coat, pea coat, anorak or leather jacket. Jeans, khakis, white shirts and tee shirts worn with dressier pieces strike an easy-going balance between day and evening clothes.
Below L and R Two images from Tory Burch S/S 2010 whose collections mix high/low and an uptown meets downtown vibe. Both images form style.com.
Wear bold accessories. Few things make a visual case for personal style like costume jewelry. A statement necklace, big cuffs, an oversized ring or two- all transform a simple look. Current looking shoes (which doesn't have to mean sky-scraping or mondo platforms) that suggest a trend will add an essential dose of now to an outfit. I guess where words fail, accessories visually articulate a woman's sense of style.
ABOVE Left: Fenton Fallon for J. Crew necklace from a selection on jcrew.com. Dries van Noten accessories from F/W 2010. Lower left: Michael Michael Kors shoe michaelkors.com. Lower right: Ann taylor sandal anntaylor.com.
One OTT piece per outfit -Whether embellished, beaded, feathered, vintage or just plain over-the-top borderline bad taste - let it rip- but keep everything else in your outfit a study in simplicity.
Clothes should fit well. Too tight. Too oversized. Bad fit and looking 'effortless' are incompatible. Having a few nips and tucks at the tailor makes dressing well effortless.
Oh and a seventh tip: Hair should evolve too. Get the best haircut (and color) you can afford. Overstyled or dated hair is a daily look killer no matter how great your outfit.
Spring has officially arrived and with it the promise of sunny days, warmer temperatures and less clothing. It's the prospect of wearing less clothing that throws me into a seasonal tailspin. Currently, my corpus is paler than an anaconda's underbelly. I don't go in for commercial spray tans. The all-angles jet spraying makes me feel like a car in for a seasonal detailing. No, I prefer a DIY at-home tan. Determined to acheive a golden faux glow (and to wear a sleeveless top to a drinks party this past weekend ) I trawled through my basket of self-tanners priced from spendy to thrify. I freely admit that I am a big self-tanning sucker who is always questing for the newest in orange-free fake tanning formulas. I'll try any product as long as it doesn't make me bleed or cry or turn me into a creamsicle.
Here are some highlights from my stash and some new finds too:
$pendy
Glow Fusion $45 is neither stinky nor streaky. It takes a few applications and a little time to build your glow but for the truly pale and freckled it looks very natural.
Sevin Nyne $35 was created by Hollywood tanning expert Lorit Simon and one of her clients actress/recidivist Lindsay Lohan. Now there is a girl who knows her way around a fake tan I thought as I read that the product promised to deliver "a kiss of color instantly' as it turned darker over the usual four hours. It delivered. My pasty hyde looks naturally sun-kissed in two applications and the formula smells like caramel instead of the usual stink. Thanks Lilo! Both sold at sephora.com.
Scott Barnes Body Bling Original $38 at skinterra contains a bronzer so you can see if you are applying an even, streak-free tan. My olive-skinned gilrfriend looks great with a little Body Bling to amp her natural skin tone. If you are lighter than a washer load of whites you will end up looking orange.
Watch SB's application demo on youtube.
Mid-Priced
Strike Gold Self-Tanning Lotion With Bronzer $15 ( 2 for $20!) let's you see how you are applying the cream to aid in a streak-free finish. A girlfriend (a nubian goddess complaining about her ashy skin) tried this and loved the boost it gave her natural coco color. I'll attest to it's imparting natural-looking color to skin as pale as wallpaper paste. bathandbodyworks.com
Jemma Kidd Year Round Body Glow $28 is a deliciously fragranced bronzer to apply for the day and then shower off. No cooking time required. It has a lovely creamy texture that's easy to apply. Available at Target stores and at target.com.
Thrifty
Palmers Sunless Tanner & Instant Bronzer with SPF 15 $ 8.99 brought to you by the cocoa butter specialists is very moisturizing and perfect for a top-to-toe bronzing. Wear it straight onto the beach and let it cook a bit before reapplying sunscreen.
Don't forget to give your skin a complete exfoliation. I like St. Ives Timeless Skin Daily Micro-Dermabrasion $4.99 followed by lashings of a heavy moisturizer to prep my skin for the tanning ahead. Both sold at drugstore.com.
Stores and catalogues are filled with the season's natural shades. And while white, ecru and khaki are no-brainers what about these 'off pastels' -brownish pinks, grayish blues and washed out mints that remind me of the makeup palettes you get when you spend $50 at Clinique.
Lots of you have sent questions asking how to wear the season's naturals that I call beigebrownypinkishgraypalebluemintygreenandalittleyellow. Does it look best when you wear all one color? Or is it better to mix natural colors in one outfit? So pictured below are four ways to think about wearing pale tones either solo or in combinations that won't look bland. All runway images from
style.com.
WEARING ONE COLOR
Combining smooth fabrics with a piece that has surface interest is a sure way to avoid monotony in a monochromatic look. Fabrics that are crinkled, crumpled, ruched, draped, and folded like origami are out there in all price ranges. Ruffled edges -especially if they look hacked by scissors, frayed edges, and textured knits do the trick as well.
L-R
Jil Sander designer Raf Simons said he was inspired by landscapes for spring. His ecru sheath combines a textural mix of sheer and opaque patches - perhaps inspired by an aerial view.
Clean lines combine with the raised texture of this Lanvin coat. Note the accessories: a soft and peachy shade looks sugar-free worn with tough, burnished metal chain necklaces.
Donna Karan's show notes said that she was inspired by the wind. Wind or not the rippled texture and frayed edges of her steel gray jacket create a curvy peplum effect.
Flounced pieces worn layered like Narcisso Rodriguez's jacket and top create drape and texture in a clean- lined white suit.
COMBINE MATTE AND SHINE
L-R
Lanvin again for a tonal mix of a matte top and a skirt with shine and drape.
Crinkled cotton lends texture to this
Ann Taylor jacket - an ideal foil for a shiney pant or skirt.
J. Crew sheeny silk linen pull-on pant for an instant look changer with a jacket.
WEAR ACCESSORIES WITH TEXTURE AND A LITTLE BIT OF TOUGH
Burnished metals, rough stones like agate, neutral python shoes and bags, shoes in camel, saddle, or brown keep soft colors from looking either twee or boring.
L-R
Doo-Ri crinkled silk dress - just the kind of shaped but potentially blah look that is an ideal canvas for accessories.
Camilla James' Proud Mary Necklace combines crystals, agate and mixed metals. For information contact nash@succarr.com.
Burnished silver bracelets at Club Monaco stores.
ADD POPS OF WARM COLOR
Salmon and coral boosts gray tones. Yellow, coral and warm saddle brown accessories break up an expanse of pale or neutral.
L-R
Donna Karan, and three images from Fendi.
I am always on the look out for the Holy of Holies in underthings; smooth, comfortable and undetectable fit under clothes but pretty and sexy too. But until mesh lace arrived on the scene, most lingerie drawers were divided firmly into two distinct camps. In one corner- utility. Flesh colored and unadorned bras and pants for smooth lines under clothes. And in the other corner, the lacey intrigue of 'date night' bras and panties trimmed with little bows and rosettes ( not so smooth under clothes, but who cared?)
Thanks to lines like
Eberjay, who claim the invention of the stretch mesh lace boyshort and who produce stretchy but shaping bras, suddenly we could have it all. So imagine my delight when I happened upon Bluebird by Eberjay- a new capsule collection sold only at
anntaylor.com. Bralets, boyshorts and briefs in black or a pale ballerina pink that are well priced, fit well, and are altogether sexy.
A style note: Still wearing a thong? Upgrade and improve the view. There isn't a girl going who does not look better with the molding, shaping support of a boyshort or brief to boost her backside. Wide lace banding at the leg (as seen on the styles above) helps avoid the look of a Sunday roast packed into your J. Brands. And if you have never tried a seamed bralet, perhaps it's time. Wide lace banding below the hooks smooths out any bra roll.
A reader recently sent in this question: "One well-known fashion editor has stated that shoulder-length hair looks good on any woman. Do you agree? What hair do you think looks fresh and appealing these days?" Great question.
Here is what I have learned on fashion shoots from some of the best hairdressers in the business: each and every face and head of hair should be treated as unique. Sure there are generalities about what cuts and layering best flatter certain facial structures. But do you want to craft your look using generic beauty tips? Never. Consulting with the best hair dresser you can possibly afford is always money well spent. Let them get their hands in your hair and feel it's weight and volume. They need to look carefully at your facial structure and symmetry. A good haircut goes a long way to balancing ones features. You need an expert pair of scissors to create an ideal 'architecture' for your face and neck and for your silhoutte head to toe. A bad haircut is like wearing the wrong hat- every single day.
In general, I am not a fan of shoulder length tresses. To my eye the length looks neither here nor there. Should I cut it or grow it? Hmm. As for what looks fresh and modern, I prefer a good line cut at the collarbone. Gwyneth Paltrow has been photographed sporting this length for several months (not that I care a wit about copying celebrities). When she lopped off her Earth Mommy mid-back length hair to her collarbone she instantly transformed her look to blade-sharp sophistication.
What does not look 'fresh and appealing?' Long, long tresses (especially on women over 35).
Barbie hair is identified with Real Housewives ( fill in the city here), Tiger Wood's mistresses, strippers, and women who in a misguided attempt to look younger make themselves look older. Very long hair is as fresh-looking as a velour track suit and a visible thong. The dictum that once a woman hits a certain age she must cut her hair signifcantly shorter is old fashioned but is the long, long hair thing the antidote? If a woman wants to look sexy and vibrant -at any age- she needs to look modern. That means wearing her hair at a length that is ideally flattering for her and not by following the pack. For most of us, any hairdresser worth their $500 scissors will explain that very long hair makes most faces looked dragged out. And that is aging. Here a few examples: Maria Shriver, an accomplished journalist and documentarian, wears her hair well past her shoulders, layered and big. Maybe this a post-feminist statement because she is far too smart to want to look like a Barbie doll. She would look younger and groovier if she cut off about 7 inches. Kathy Lee Gifford has multi-layered, too-long hair that is very Barbie (or bimbo?- I'm just saying). I watched her the other morning and imagined how with a trim of 5 inches or more she would look a good 5 years younger, chicer and all around more plugged-in to anything resembling current style. Notice her co-host Hoda Kotb's simple and modern-looking ( and more youthful) hair style.
So ladies, is it time for a haircut? The number one way to spruce up for spring - before you buy any piece of clothing or even a new lipstick - is to re-think your hair.
Real girls are in fashion - at least this month. Yesterday's New York Times Thursday Styles featured a front page piece about recent fashion magazine stories with plus-sized models. If you read
Glamour you have seen pictures of Crystal Renn (the subject of the Times article) a very gorgeous size 12. The current fashion pages of
V Magazine feature Crystal and other plus-sized beauties in their fashion pages this month. So all of this begs the question are these just one offs? What do women really want to look at in fashion magazines? Could fashion's aesthetic be changing to depict a range of bodies?
What do you think?
If you are a full fashioned beauty yourself, here's a link to the current issue of Lucky and the plus-sized clothing web sites they love. This came to me by way of my friend Lisa Dolan the owner of
Leelee's Valise one of the sites included in the lineup. I feautured Leelees in my book Style Evolution as one of my favorite resources for curvy girls.
One fundamental of fashion- a great silhouette begins at the shoulders. How a shoulder is cut defines a tailored piece of clothing like a jacket or coat. Armholes too. In dressmaking the armhole is carefully considered. Too tight and the piece will strain and crease across the shoulders ( front and back). A too tight sleeve also causes the dreaded sausage arm. An armhole that is cut too big and a sleeve that is too wide creates baggage under the armpit and instantly adds visual pounds. Another fashion fundamental- bad fit equals style implosion.
So when restyling a jacket start with something that fits you reasonably well. Recutting an armhole or refashioning a shoulder is expensive and the results can be disappointing.
Changing a jacket or coat collar from a shape like Peter Pan, for example, to a smaller point collar can transform the look from retro to modern. Remove a collar altogether for a clean, minimalist line. Narrowing a too wide lapel to a current-looking width or shortening sleeves to a 3/4 length are common requests and will not cost a lot. I recently took a black tux style jacket from 3 years ago ( at least) to my tailor for a sleeve removal. He finished the armholes beautifully and suggested that he narrow the lapels - just a tick- for balance. The result is a new jacket/vest for under $75.
Wide leg pants languishing in your closet? It is easy for a tailor to narrow the leg to an au courant stovepipe line. What about that poker straight skirt ( with the weird length)? Restyling a straight skirt to a pencil shape is easy. The success of the pencil is the subtle narrowing at the hem that gives it that essential curve.
A sack shape dress to a sheath? In general, an easy fix. An unheard of sale on designer jeans but the available sizes are too big? Go ahead. A tailor can style them to fit.
Shopping your closet can be better than bargain hunting. Hit the attic. It could be a treasure hunt. If you don't have a good tailor it is time to find one.
Imagine walking pain free in a pair of high heels without popping a Xanax? Determined to learn how, I recently dragged my tired and swollen dogs to the Backbones and Wingspan Pilates Studio for a High Heel Recovery Clinic. Trudging from the subway to the studio I imagined a scene from the documentary
Paris Is Burning and a task master instructor barking "Girl, you better work!" Instead, I was greeted at the door by the zen countenance of Tim Driscoll the studio director and a respected teacher on the NYC pilates scene. Tim along with fellow teacher Cathy Ferrara have developed the clinic in response to clients with all kinds of lower back pain, calf strain and shin splints related to wearing vertiginous heels.
According to Tim "The heel is probably the most under-utilized part of the body. When someone can expand into their heels and into the back of their shoe rather than letting their heel shove forward onto the ball of the foot then they can get relief." The key, he explained, is to connect with the upper back of your legs rather than your lower back or the balls of your feet.
To put us in touch with this sensation it was time to walk around the room. We'd been asked to bring a 'challenging' pair of heels. I put on my red patent leather Fendi sandals that slice into my toes like a cheese knife. Walking with all the grace of a middle-aged cross dresser in size 13 pumps, I noticed the woman in front of me. Elisabeth, a slim 50-something was navigating swan-like in a pair of 6" St. Laurent platform sandals. How could she stand it?
Then it was shoes off for mat work designed to identify critical body/pressure points that are engaged when walking in high heels. First, the core since all things balance and posture rely on a strong trunk. Three sets of hamstrings ( 3? who knew?). Asked to imagine these as strings reaching right up into our butts, I tried to visualize my hammies rising up to tether two balloons (or rather, bum cheeks a bit larger than I'd like them to be). By tucking my tail -just slightly- I instantly felt a strong connection right there. Finally, the hip flexors-that 'pocket' of muscle at the very top of your thighs.
Next, we lay down on mats and for the next 30 minutes Cathy led the group in a series of exercises designed to help us open up the pelvis and to feel the hamstring/bum connection. With our knees bent and our calves and heels flush with the top of the ball, we were directed to place our arms at our sides, palms down, and to raise our bums until we created what Tim Driscoll calls a 'suspension bridge'. Visualize what a suspension bridge looks like and this make perfect sense. Ahh! An immediate release of tension in my flexors. Please try this at the gym or at home if you have an exercise ball at the end of the day to work out tension.
Finally, we lay on our stomachs and raised both our arms and feet - just slightly- off the matt in a kind of semi-superman in flight move. Again, ever so subtly I could feel a connection to my core, my 'tethered balloons and an engagement in my hip flexors. All the sensations came together and I was ready to try on those tortuous Fendi's and take a spin around the room.
So, try this little sequence the next time you slip on any heel over 3 inches. Breath -not a deep belly breath- but so you expand the width of your back. Lean ever so slightly into your back and feel how that subtle movement puts you into your hammies and bum connection which simultaneously opens up the hip flexors. In making these connections you will feel a subtle shift back onto your heels and away from the balls of your feet. This works. Check out Tim's blog for more about high heel recovery
http://pilatesiconoclast.typepad.com/universalprinciples/high-heel-healing/
Backbone and Wingspan is a unique fitness studio dedicated to the
functional principles of movement explored through a variety of methods
including Pilates, GYROTONIC®, The Feldenkrais Method®,
CranioSacral Therapy and Physical Therapy.
To learn more about Backbone and Wingspan and its instructors or to see
the schedule for other upcoming free clinics, go to
www.backboneandwingspan.com
or see the Backbone and Wingspan Facebook Fan Page.
For studio inquiries, press previews, and reservations:
Call: 212-647-8878 or direct email to
tim@backboneandwingspan.com
